Mollie’s First Day of Pre-K

August 17, 2017

Skyview Elementary, Yukon

Oh my gravy…. how did this day come soooo fast!  We can’t believe that Mollie is in school all day, every day.  I have been dreading this, praying and gearing myself up all summer.  What was I going to do without my girl?  She was also such a great helper with Reed being so little.  We knew that she was ready… and that was affirmed even more when she marched right into her class and settled in without shedding a tear. 

The night before, her teachers had given us some fun “Ready Confetti” to sprinkle under her pillow.  Through tears, I read her the cute little poem and off to bed she went.  Nate made such fun of me but his time was coming…

I made sure to get everyone up extra early for mandatory first day pictures.

My heart was bursting and I had a lump in my throat the whole time.  Everyone says that time goes even faster when they start school, and now I know they are right.  Nate and I are so very proud of our big girl and love her soooo much. 

Like I said before, Mollie was fine at drop off.  I had a few tears… but Daddy couldn’t stop crying.  He had not prepared like I had, and now we had just left our baby with strangers, in a new place and it was weird.  There was no way we were making it to the tour after drop off…. we basically ran out of there, wiping our eyes all the way to the car.

The next day went a little better:

Your dad and I are your biggest fans!  Go change the world, baby girl.  This is our prayer for you this school year:

“Keep your eyes open, Hold tight to your convictions, Give it all you’ve got, Be resolute, and Love without stopping” 1 Cor. 16:13-14

Keep your eyes open…. make sure you are seeing the people around you.  Obey and respect your teachers, and look for opportunities to befriend your classmates.

Hold tight to your convictions…. you know what’s right and what’s wrong.  You know when others are hurt or confused.  Don’t ever make someone feel bad.  Remember what we’ve taught you and remember what God has already put in your sweet little tender heart.

Give it all you’ve got…. At whatever you’re doing in class, do it right.  And, do it to the best of your ability.  We know you can do it all!

Be resolute…. Lead.  Don’t be a follower and do things just because others are. 

Love without stopping… We see your kind heart.  Show your class.

Generous Compassionate Hope

Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”  {Luke 23:13-15}

 In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ {Acts 20:35}

…………………………………………………….

We recently went through a short series with our youth about greed.  It stood out as something I definitely need to remember and also, something I hope to always teach Mollie. 

The gist is… Greed will ultimately make you miserable.  To break the “gotta have everything…. and right now” selfish mentality that is so prevalent these days, we need to do three things:

1.  We have to offer generosity and increase the joy in our lives. 

2.  We need to pay attention to those around us and show compassion in any situation. 

3.  We need to offer the hope of Jesus to the world around us.

People are always wanting more.  It doesn’t matter what it is… money, clothes, electronics, make-up, cars, boats, houses, vacations… if it isn’t more of Jesus, there is probably a problem.  When this issue of greed comes up, I always think about seeing my friends sell everything they own and move to China to be missionaries.   It’s gut check time when you have to choose one tub of things to keep out of your whole house.  One tub, people!  How Christ-focused do you have to be to do that?  It is an awesome gauge to use…. ask yourself, if I was asked to give this up, would I be able to?  When the answer is no, you have become consumed with something that isn’t worth your time.  And then the more you have, the more it takes… or the more you want.

Greed will eventually steal your happiness.  Steal the joy that should radiate your life (if you know Christ).  And the easiest way to cure greed…. is to give.  Being generous is a wonderful trait!  One that I strive to have in my life.  And, one I’m constantly trying to teach Mollie.  I am blessed to know several generous people in my life but I would say my best friend Melissa, is the most generous person I know. 

She gives so much of herself and asks nothing in return.  I have seen her selfless attitude first hand so many times…. She gives her time endlessly to ministries at church.  Now that she has a great women’s ministry off the ground, she is starting a children’s ministry from scratch.  She gives her money to people in need or ministries at church, even when she needs it herself.  She gives her undivided attention to everyone she talks to… and plays with every baby or kid around.  Just last night I watched her play “Anna and Elsa” with my daughter through a whole football game.  And lastly, she gives her influence…. being open to talk to others about things she’s learned.

I know first hand that it is such a blessing to have someone like this in your life.  If we give of ourselves to others, joy will come.  And if we pay attention to needs and look for ways to meet people where they are, greed will melt away.  And if we can somehow spread the hope we have in Jesus… there are no limits to the blessings that will fall.

The challenge to take away is this….. Ask yourself where you can practice generosity… with your time…. with your money…. with your attention… with your stuff…. with your influence???  And make a conscious effort to get over whatever is holding you back and do it!  Always remember that the people around you need compassion.  Look for ways to serve them, help them, or stand up for them.  And pray that God would help you shine His light and show hope to someone that needs it.  If you take the time to look around, I promise there is someone right in front of you that is craving a generous act, compassionate smile, or word of hope.

A Little Cut

October 19, 2015

For my upcoming 30th birthday I wanted to do something memorable. My hair has always been a big thing for me. In my mind, It's my shield and I hide behind it.
So, I decided to chop it off.... to do something crazy for my bday, to create a new kind of confidence, to celebrate that there are way more important things in life, and to hopefully bless someone going through a hard time.
I'm praying that the person that eventually wears the wig with my hair in it, will feel comfort, confidence, know our Savior and be on her way to complete physical healing.

The Waiting Game

WAIT:  verb (used without object)

1. to remain inactive or in a state of repose, until something expected happens

2. to remain neglected for a time

3. to look forward to eagerly

When I hear the word WAIT, the first thing I thing I think is…. “story of my life.”  Then I quickly survey my life and realize there are certain, very important, things where I didn’t have to WAIT too long. Like meeting and falling in love with my wonderful husband in the 8th grade.  But in every instance…. the WAITing ones and the not…. I can see God’s provision in my life.  There are still some things that I don’t understand, but I know in time God will show me a huge life lesson…. case in point: the year 2010.

The above definitions for the word WAIT give me mixed emotions: 1. sad, 2. depressed, and 3. hopeful.  When WAITing on anything, for just a short time or for years, it seems, maybe, as if God has forgotten you… He’s not hearing the cries of my heart, people… Or maybe the situation gets the best of you and you just quit praying all together.  That’s where I get when the WAITing game seems like too much to bear, where I feel totally “neglected for a time” and ready to sleep/eat my worries away.  But then sweet little definition #3 comes…. and I can continue to “look forward to eagerly” the blessings that God is going to give me soon.  And, look at all the beautiful blessings that are right in front of my face.

WAITing on God is something that is commanded:

“But you much return to your God, Maintain love and justice, and WAIT for your God always”  Hosea 12:6

“WAIT for the Lord, Be strong and take heart and WAIT for the Lord” Psalm 27:14

“Be still before the Lord and WAIT patiently for Him” Psalm 37:7

“Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you.  Therefore He will rise up to show you compassion.  For the Lord is a God of justice.  Blessed are all who WAIT for Him!”  Isaiah 30:18

We WAIT for His providence, His salvation, and His blessings….. Especially these days, where we are privileged to live in an instant and selfish United States.  But there are some benefits to WAITing on God.  It leads to expectancy… It leads to hope… It leads to trust… And it leads to patience.

“In the morning, Lord, You hear my voice.  In the morning I lay my requests before You and WAIT expectantly.”  Psalm 5:3

“We WAIT in hope for the Lord.  He is our help and our shield”  Psalm 33:20

“I will WAIT for the Lord… I will put my trust in Him”  Isaiah 8:17

“But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we WAIT for it patiently”  Romans 8:25

And, we can always know that we are not alone.  And that things can always get worse or be worse.  Everyone is WAITing on something.  What I do while I WAIT is what’s important.  I can’t let myself grow bitter and more selfish… only better and more reliant on The One who’s in charge. 

Thinking through the Bible… there are soooo many people that WAITed years for God’s promises to be fulfilled:  Abraham & Sarah, Zechariah & Elizabeth, Joseph, Daniel, David, Ruth, Esther, Moses, Jacob, Paul, and even Jesus Himself.  Everything happens in God’s timing and who am I to ask why something isn’t happening right when I want it.

As I am turning 30 in a few short weeks, I am grateful for the knowledge I have on this subject…. way more than the average lady my age, I know that.  It has made me into the woman I am today.  Though it has been a hard lesson to learn, it has helped me to be more grounded and more grateful.  Life is too short to worry about whatever I am WAITing on.  I have learned that it is so comforting and so beautiful to fully rely and trust God for the desires of my heart.  He knows my heart and I pray everyday that it would be pure and steadfast.  That’s the bottom line.  That’s the end of my WAITing game. 

(Some of this was taken from BibleGateway.com.  A great resource that’s always at your fingertips)

Mother’s Day 2014

May 11, 2014

I loooove being a mother.  The only thing I ever wanted to be was a wife and mother.  That is why anniversaries and Mother’s days are THE BEST!  I feel so very fortunate to be a mother…. To have had the experience of being pregnant and bringing a baby into the world… And to get to take care of our precious Mollie girl. 

I love you with every breath, sweet girl.  I’m so thankful to be your Mom!

Live and Breath

Last Sunday, April 29th, would have been my friend Kristin’s 26th birthday.  I spent a lot of time this month thinking about her, and even more time on Sunday.  I had a good ugly cry, because it is just so heartbreaking when someone’s life is cut short… especially a good friend.

Kristin and I at her wedding ~ November 2004 

But then, I remembered the lessons I learned when my other great friend passed away right after we graduated from college.  It was in June 2008 and I will never forget the tearful message from her dad on my phone.  That day changed my life forever.  I struggled with extreme guilt and disbelief.  Why should I have the opportunity to be with my husband when she couldn’t anymore?  Why should I be able to enjoy a meal, take a vacation, or even breath?  Courtney will never get to do these things.  She will never get to have those babies we always talked about and enjoy her new house with her high-school sweetheart husband.

Courtney and I at our college graduation ~ May 2008

Those were some of the darkest days of my life as I searched out what God was trying to teach me.  When I heard Courtney’s family talk about how she was looking down on us wishing she could be here, it hit me…. no she’s not!  Courtney (and now Kristin) is in the very presence of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!  She isn’t wishing for the things of this world.  They aren’t even thinking of us like we are thinking of them… There is no time in Heaven.  My friends are in a perfect place where their souls are at rest in the very presence of Jesus.  Who am I to wish they were still here on this earth?  In all actuality, we are the ones that are here in this increasingly evil world.

I say all this just because I have spent this entire month extremely grateful and humbled for the wonderful life I get to live on this earth.  I also say all these things to remind myself that we are not home… We are just temporary travelers in a foreign land… dots on the timeline of eternity…

God thank you for life.  For blessings.  For giving us the desires of our hearts.  Lord, please help me to live with eternity in mind and set my feet firm on your path for my life.

“The Day a Weight was Lifted”

I strongly believe that one of the reasons God allows “storms” in our life is so we can help others that go through the same thing.  So we can learn about ourselves, and have a lasting testimony of our Lord and Saviors providential timing and see how He sustains us.

Last night in Nate’s talk to the youth he said that God wants to show His greatness to others through your storm.  The point of pain in our lives isn’t to suck it up or walk it off… It’s to show the beauty and grace of our Savior.

I have found that I am a becoming a writer.  I have kept journals since I can remember, but lately it has gone to a whole different level… I have to write to get things off my chest.  I have to write to vent my feelings.  I just have to write.

This is what I wrote in my journal yesterday…

Ah!  Sweet relief!  After being in Yukon and having our house in Rogers for sale for 2 1/2 years… It finally sold today!  Closing was at 2pm and we got a call around 3:30 with the good news.  That was 1,080 days of waiting on the Lord.  This was the 4th or 5th offer we got and I was so scared that they were going to back out too.  Praise the Lord they didn’t. 

Getting our papers signed and sending them off!

I feel like a different person without this over my head.  Many times I have felt sorry for myself… calling this “storm” in my life a nightmare.  Things couldn’t have gone worse.  At least that’s how I felt.  Nate and I were on our knees about this situation everyday.  Our minds, hearts, and money has been in two different towns.  We would go through “what if?” situations, like:  What if our first realtor would have priced it right back in October 2009?  What if our second realtor would have done a better job with the rent-to-own option?  What if we wouldn’t have let a bum live there for 10 months?

Now, being finished with the whole ordeal, I am saying “what if?” in a different way… What if we didn’t have the love and provision of our Almighty God to put all our hope and faith in?  What if our families didn’t support us and continually offer help and support?  What if I didn’t have such wonderful friends that prayed everyday for me when I couldn’t?  What if our church family didn’t love and support us?  What if God hadn’t provided the money we needed to live or places to live (like my brother’s barn or our church’s mission house)?  Seriously, what if?

I am blessed beyond what I can even believe.  There is no reason that I deserve so much.  There is no explanation as to why Nate and I are not in debt up to our eyeballs, in foreclosure, or homeless and hungry… Besides the wonderful provision of our awesome Lord and Savior, and the faithful prayers of His children.  I am so thankful for so much right now in this moment.

Celebratory Italian nachos!

I always say that we learn a lot from these “unforeseen storms” of life, and Nate and I aren’t to sure if we learned anything of great importance BUT I do know of some things.  We learned patience… with God, others, each other and money.  We learned that God will provide!  And that we are horrible landlords and should never own another rental property.  We learned how to look for a good realtor.  And what depression feels like.  We learned what it was like to face a huge crisis, and how to support each other in the midst of it.  We learned about short sales.  I learned I was a really good letter writer (there was no way they were saying no).  I learned the feeling of genuine community and dependence on the two best friends that I’ve ever had in my life.  I learned that Nate and I have a deep, un-shattering love for each other… even deeper than I thought.

Celebratory dinner with friends!

I’m sure more gratefulness and more things I learned will come to me in the following days, but today I will just relish the love of my Heavenly Father, my wonderful husband, my best friends, my family, and my church.  This leap year 2012 will forever be a memory in my life.  “The day a weight was lifted” I like to say.  A day that will live in infamy… just joking ;)

It is good to feel more like myself and hear Nate genuinely laugh.  It’s been a while and we are ready to make this whole “owning one house instead of two” thing the new normal.  Oh, what a life we get to lead.

So, if you are in the midst of a storm, and need some encouragment… know that this storm is not the end of your story.  Know that it will end some day.  Don’t allow it to take you over.  Allow it to shape you into a more faithful follower of Christ.

Goodbye darling house.  We will always love and cherish our time with you!

August 2005 – November 2009

3600 West Beechwood Drive. Rogers, AR 72756

He holds my lot.

Have you ever found yourself in a place where you felt the enemy was totally there seeking your slaughter?  Have you ever felt like your prayers aren’t being heard?  Do you find yourself asking God why?  Are you going through such a hard time, that there seems to be no end in sight?  Are you impatient?  Unwilling to step out on faith?  Or just plain tired of life?

Thankfully, I have gone through the valleys before and have learned how to not get depressed or stressed…. and to totally put all my hope and faith in The One that can get you through.  Nate and I are, yet again, going through one of these times right now with the sell of our car/house.  God has already shown us how His hand is all over this situation and I totally expect Him to do something amazing in the next couple weeks.  I choose to believe that November 2011 will be a great month for us.  But, if God’s timing is not now…. He is still God and He is still good! 

Psalm 15:5-6 was mentioned in our Beth Moore Esther Bible Study and I love this so much I wanted to share.  We learned early on in the study about casting lots…. which is basically a gamble.  In these verses think of your portion as your destiny and your cup as what you are going through right now….. In other words:

God, You know my future and You know what I am going through right now; You take the dice of my life and make it land where You want…. There is no gamble with You… You make my life safe and give me peace.

Isn’t is comforting to know that God is already on the other side of every situation.  He is in control.  There is no need to fear or worry.  He will sustain us and if what we think should happen doesn’t….. there is another way for things to work out.  Beth Moore hit the nail on the head when she said, “when all is said and done, we will see that the portion God assigned to us was good.  Right.  Rich.  Full of purpose.”

So, when you find yourself in a dark place.  Stop, rest easy, and find wonderful peace and comfort knowing that He is in control.  He holds your lot. 

“Oh, that we would wake up to the goodness of our God and the crushing defeat of our enemy!” –Beth Moore

Livin' on Love

Welp... If it's not one thing, it's another, right?  The family that was supposed to buy our house in Rogers.... they have been renting to own for the last 12 months.... lied to us.  They have been continually lying to us for all of these months and refuse to answer our calls/texts. 

We made the decision to kick them out last week and haven't looked back.  They should be out on the 31st and we will be there (with the police) to make sure that happens.  Then the cleaning up non stop for a couple days will comense and we will get our cute little house back to "selling shape." 

Surprisingly, Nate and I are at complete peace with this decision.  Even though paying two mortgages is as close to impossible as we can get, we are optimistic about the upcoming months.  We will totally be living on love... and Ramen noodles :)

This house brought us soooo much joy and will always be a happy memory for us, so it makes me really sad to think about it being such a head ache now.  But, God will provide and we will make it just fine.  We have some plans about how we are gonna make it.... I will work at a daycare after my job at church, we are canceling our cable and internet next week (after Project Runway is over), maybe set some tombstones for my dad on the weekends, sell some crafts, and if it comes down to it.... refinance or sell our vehicles.

It should be an adventure for the next few months.  Hopefully the house will sell super fast and we will have another story about how God provided just when we needed Him.  Like I explained in my last post, I can be brave... even in this situation... which has been a fear of mine for a year now. 

Fill in the blank with your fears....

IF ________________, then God!

No matter what happens.... No matter how you fill in the blank, God will get you through.



I’m Telling This Story For a Few Reasons…

Last weekend our new Women’s Ministry at church had our kick off event… Mugs & Muffins.  It was so great, and God blessed all of our efforts and answered prayers!  Our guest speaker, Glenette Russell, challenged us all to get involved and open our eyes to where we need to serve in this new ministry.  When she had finished I gave a short testimony to kind of…. encourage all the ladies to not waste their lives.  I didn’t get to say all of the following, but this is what I had planned…

I am going to close with a story.  This is the story of great friendship… the kind that lasts a lifetime.  Let me start by saying I’m not telling you all this to make you sad or depressed or anything… I’m telling you all this story to show that God is sovereign.  He is in control.  He still works miracles, and most importantly to remind all of us to not waste any of the time we have left on this earth.

Nate and I got married right after he graduated from college, here at OBU.  I still had three years left (yes, Nate is three years older than me) so when we moved to Arkansas, I went to the U of A.  When you are married and in college for a degree, and not to party you quickly find others that are like you.  I had one great friend in college, Courtney.  Courtney and I met in my first class in business school.  After that semester we coordinated our schedules and took every possible class together.  She was full of life and always stretched me to get out of my perfectionist ways.  Like whenever I would doodle all through class, Courtney would bump my hand and make me mess up, or just draw a big line across the page… If you know me, you know that is a big deal.  As I look back at that time I treasure those memories because Courtney taught me not to take things so seriously.  She taught me how to slow down and see the big picture.  After we graduated from college in May 2008 we make plans to go to dinner so our husbands could finally meet.  Nate and I just had to go to one youth camp first.  It was Wednesday night of camp when Courtney’s dad called me with the news that she had died.  That was June 18, 2008.  So instead of going to dinner together, I went to her funeral.

Kristin and I got to know each other in middle school and by the time we were eighth graders we had a bond that couldn’t be broken.  Do you notice how your friends are a lot like you?  Well, Kristin and I were that way… We had the same morals, the same mind set, and the same dreams.  I don’t think about middle school or high school or my wedding without thinking of Kristin.  In middle school we would draw pictures of our futures with our husbands.  Then in high school we would go on all kinds of choir trips and she would make me tapes of her singing for my birthdays.  She lit up the room with her laughter.  She was a red head that could always make anyone smile.  On July 29, a few weeks ago, while Nate and I were in Wal-Mart of all places, Nate got a call.  It was someone close to her family giving me the news that she had died while on vacation with her family in Hawaii.

You are probably wondering… how did Courtney and Kristin die?  Well, on motorcycles…. but that isn’t important.  What is important is why I felt like I needed to share this story.  I am 25 years old and have lost two of my best friends.  I spent a lot of time in prayer after these two deaths, and especially after Kristin died a few weeks ago just trying to go see a sunset with her husband.  I asked God why?  I started to throw a pitty party for myself asking Him, If this normal… to have two good friends die?  Couldn’t Kristin and JD just waited one more minute to leave their hotel room… then that truck wouldn’t have hit them.  Couldn’t Courtney have waited til her husband got home to go for a ride?  There were endless questions.  But last Thursday after Kristin’s celebration of life ceremony, I felt at peace, which is why I am able to stand here and talk about it right now.  God worked a miracle of peace in my heart and in Courtney’s family back in 2008.  And God worked a miracle in my heart and in Kristin’s family just a few weeks ago.  I feel that it is my job to keep Courtney’s and Kristin’s story alive.

The best thing about both of my friends… they were dedicated, authentic, faithful followers of Christ and I know where they are right now.  Courtney served in her church every time someone came to know the Lord.  She was there counseling with them and standing there with a towel when they got baptized.  Kristin was an extremely gifted singer and had been leading worship in her churches since high school.  Their lives were not wasted, and today I feel like I’m following God’s prompting, getting way out of my comfort zone, and telling this story for a few simple reasons….

Sure, so my friends’ memories will live on, but more than that….. So we won’t take our fragile, temporary lived for granted…. So each one of us can look forward to Heaven and carry that hope around with us every day…. So we, as women, will not take for granted the friendships we have or the ones we need to make… So we can get past ourselves and get our focus on what really matters, and that is the Lord, Jesus Christ….. And mostly, so we can search ourselves and see what God is call us to do.

What is God calling you to do in your own personal relationship with Him?  In your family?  In your church?  And, if you are a part of FBCY, in this new women’s ministry?

 

For more information on Ladies Of Love Women’s Ministry, click HERE

Why Do We Suffer?

On July 29, 2011, I got a call with some shocking news.  One of my best high school friends was killed in a motorcycle accident while on vacation in Hawaii.  It makes me realize how fragile and temporary life really is, but more than that it makes me thankful that I have the hope of an eternity in heaven.  I also know that Kristin had that hope in her life, and lived out her faith.
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I don't think of high school without thinking about Kristin and everything she meant to me.  We had a lot in common and were always dreaming of our futures.  When we were in 8th grade we drew out a picture of how we wanted our lives to go (below)... hers with JD and mine with Nate... It is pretty remarkable that both of our dreams came true when we married the men we started dating in 8th grade (and are still married to them).  It is also heart breaking to know that Kristin's plans for a family with JD will never come to be, and I feel a little guilty that I still have that chance.
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(Notice the details... We are pregnant, and those are churches in the background where Nate and JD are youth pastors)

Kristin had a way with people, and was friends with everyone.  She didn't overlook the outcasts and had a smile and laugh that lit up the room.  I will never forget some of her looks and one she would always give me when she sang on stage.... kind of a "I'm doing this because you pressured me, but I love it" thing.  She used her singing talents for the Lord, and will leave a lasting impression on everyone that ever got to listen.  I will also always remember her fun, shoot me in the arm, personality.  She took me to Hooters on my 19th birthday just to see my face turn red.  I woke her up on her wedding day and documented everything, and she was a bridesmaid in my wedding. And, I will forever count her as one of my best friends.

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I know that Kristin's life was not wasted and am very happy to have the peace that she is in heaven right now in the very presence of Jesus, who she loved so much.  I also know that she would want the love of her Heavenly Father to be preached a little, and this sermon from a few weeks ago has been on my mind, so here goes....

Why We Suffer?

*Suffering is a normal part of being a Christian... but the suffering doesn't win!

4 Reasons We Suffer As Christians

1- Sometimes we suffer for the cause of Christ.

"We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.  For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that His life may be revealed in our mortal body."

-2 Cor. 4:10-11

"...though now for a little while you may have to suffer grief in all kinds of trials.  These have come so that your faith - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory, and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed."

-1 Peter 1:6-7

When we suffer the right way: we start to look more like Christ, and God is glorified.

2-Sometimes we suffer for the benefit of others

"We are glad whenever we are weak but you are strong; and our prayer is for your perfection (salvation)."

-2 Cor. 13:9

We want others to notice our perfect peace in difficult times.  People should say, "look at the way the handled ____."

The difficult times set us, as Christians, apart from other moral people.

3-Sometimes we suffer for our own inner renewal.

"Therefore we do not lose heart.  Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."

-2 Cor. 4:16

As we get older, our body wears out more and more, but your relationship with God should be growing more and more.

"Jesus Said, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me..... For when I am weak, then I am strong."

-2 Cor. 12:9-10

4- We suffer because our treasure is in heaven.

"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen.  For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

-2 Cor 4: 17-18

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Kristin had a personal relationship with Christ.  She understood that there is life after death.  If you have questions about your eternity, get it figured out today.  You are not a Christian just because, you were born in America or because you're a good person.  Don't be sad for Kristin because she isn't up in Heaven wishing she was here on earth.... But seriously examine your own heart and make sure you will be seeing her again.

Lately...

"Without vision, the people perish"

3.23.11

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What's going on with us these days?

Nate continues to work as hard as he possibly can at church. He is always busy with youth things and now media too, but things feel like they are on pause. Really, our church has no vision. We are pushing through all the feelings of doubt and choosing to believe that we are here "for such a time as this."

Things are going to have to change drastically very soon. Every week we (us and a lot of the congregation) feel more and more exhausted. I am craving genuine worship and community. How is this church ever going to change? It has to change or it will eventually die.... It's like a contestant on The Biggest Loser. We need some leadership to come in and whip us into shape. Is there a Bob and Jillian out there for churches? Who knows?

I sit in the church office everyday and try to think of things to make it better, but there really is no point right now. Therefore, work is a little stressful/boring right now. I am still on weight watchers and love it, so I will stay on it until these last 18 pounds are gone. It may take forever, but I'm ready for it. I am over half way to my goal of losing 40 lbs.

Other than taking care of my Nate, myself, and my new kitchen not a lot has been going on. All in all, we are happy and healthy and enjoying each other and our house more than ever.

Hope

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not on so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." ~Romans 5:1-8

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Hope [hohp] noun 1. the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best .

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Last week I would have told you something that I haven't felt in a while. I was hopeless. I was searching out God's will and was feeling like nothing was going to change.... Like Nate and I were patching up holes in a sinking boat and once we would fix one hole, another would pop up.... Was it worth it? Were we helping the situation? What on earth is going on? What is God doing here?

In my quiet times I would write out pages of questions I had about our life, our church, our youth, and so on. What I have slowly been learning is that my hope should not, and is not found in situations at church (thank goodness), my hope is that God's love has been poured out into my heart through the Holy Spirit. I should boast in that! I should brag, have joy and pride in that! I have been letting situations that seem hopeless make me hopeless, when really it is these times that build perseverance, character, and hope.

Do you let hard situations steal your hope?

I am learning to let those selfish, worthless feelings of hopelessness in a seemingly hopeless situation fly away. I don't want to put my mighty God in a box. We serve a huge, mighty, powerful God that loves us unconditionally and there is always hope in that.

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Heal my heart and make it clean

Open up my eyes to the things unseen

Show me how to love like You have loved me

Break my heart for what breaks Yours

Let everything I am work for Your Kingdoms cause

The Weight Watcher

I couldn't fit into any of my clothes? Does that mean something?

I think so...

This last year, I gained more weight than I thought. If you read my blog you know what kind of a year we had. All the stress, sadness, and eating out really took a toll on me.

So, at the beginning of this year I knew I had to face the scale... (if for nothing else, than being able to wear more than one pair of jeans in my closet)

*Those aren't my feet, just in case you were wondering*

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So, on January 4th me and three of my friends started Weight Watchers!

It has been fairly easy. There are so many great things you can eat out there that are fat free. Any diet where I can eat 20 chips for 1 point is great!

+ I have my friends doing it too, a great couple of friends that have lost lots of weight cooking for me every now and then, and a wonderful husband that keeps telling me he's proud.

If I am tempted to eat something bad, I just think about that number on the scale and I don't want it anymore. ha

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So, in the last three weeks I have lost 12 lbs. Yeah! I get to go have my 10 lb reward pedicure later this week!

Stay tuned for some more weight loss posts... I weigh every Monday.

Good things come to those who wait.... Right?

Well, now we don't know when we are going to close on our house. Something always gets messed up with us. Really... I feel like nothing can just happen the way it's supposed to.

But, the good news is it will definitely be before October 8th. We were trying to close early so the sellers wouldn't have to pay another month's mortgage, but our finance guy didn't get the memo.... or at least he forgot about that little detail. It is only 8 more days, but after waiting 11 months I can hardly sleep at night because I am so excited to unpack.

I am constantly thinking about how we are going to decorate. Like all the time. It is driving Nate crazy, but I am just excited.

Here is what "we" are thinking:

This is my inspiration. We got it at Garden Ridge and I am in love with it. I know exactly where I'm going to put it. I'm going for eclectic country.... or something like that.

And, I have a new theory.... less is more. I don't feel like I have to hang something on every wall like I did in our first house.

This is our new pantry. It is going to house all our food. It is currently sitting with all our other stuff in two boxes (one weighs 90 lbs and the other 70lbs...we figure it will be easier to move this way) just waiting to be put together. Can't wait to see it in person. These are our new outside lights. Nate already has some projects lined up :) New inside lights.

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Now, this is the stuff I am looking for.... and will buy when we replenish our bank accounts.

I want 4 antique ceiling tiles to put together in a square. I can't find these things anywhere. Where else do I look?

I bet they will have some at Affair of the Heart (a huge craft show here in OKC)! Can't wait for that.

Furniture! It doesn't necessarily need to be leather, but we definitely want a dark brown couch, love seat, and recliner. We have been married long enough to finally buy our own furniture, right?

A sofa table. Who knows what color or shape.... we just need one. Our new house is so open we don't want people just staring at the back of our couch. I plan on putting our digital picture frame on it. (my Christmas present from last year that's still in the box) I like little decorative chairs with weird fabric. I like this print, but would also be open to some polka dots or stripes :)

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That is all for now. I'm sure I will think of something else in about 3 minutes. ha.

Anybody out there have any questions, comments, concerns, or suggestions? I don't hate comments :)